A Tribute to My Father

Author:  Sarah

If you’ve ever tried to write a eulogy for someone, then you know it’s pretty challenging.  How do you express a lifetime of love in just a few paragraphs?  I assure you that what I have to say is inadequate; but I hope to convey a reasonable reflection of my father.  

Dad was kind and generous.  He was a good neighbor.  I have memories of him using his snowblower to clear nearly every driveway on our street.  Always willing to lend a helping hand.

Roger J. Metivier

October 19, 1949 - August 12, 2017

He loved his family and he LOVED ice cream.  That’s right.  Dad’s passion for ice cream is eulogy worthy and I have a story to prove it.  My husband Chris is more of a cake guy.  He grew up in a family that celebrated birthdays with cake but not necessarily ice cream.  So, for our daughter’s third birthday Chris decided that we would serve cake but no ice cream.  Please let the record reflect that I did caution him.  Well, when it came time for dessert naturally Dad asked “where’s the ice cream?”  When we responded “there’s no ice cream, Dad,  just cake” he couldn’t believe it.  I’m sure that he’d spent all day anticipating a couple of scoops of his favorite frozen treat and we had clearly disappointed him.  He was so put out that on the drive home from our house he made Mom stop for an ice cream cone.

I learned many life lessons from my father but the one that I think about nearly every day is something he said to me several years ago.  I must have been home from college on break.  I was complaining about something and I honestly don’t remember what it was which only helps to illustrate this point.  Dad finally shrugged and said to me “worse things have happened to better people.”

Now, that seems sort of harsh but Dad wasn’t exactly a tactful person and I know that he did not intend to offend me.  He simply wanted me to gain a little perspective.  No matter what your challenges are there is always someone out there who has it worse off than you.  I’ve learned that when you embrace that idea it’s easier to appreciate the good things that might otherwise be overlooked.

For instance, I am so thankful that I had a chance to be with Dad last Saturday.  I brought my children for an afternoon visit and we spent a couple of good hours together.  Later, when he was in the hospital, Mom, Eric, and I were all there with him.  We were together when he passed.  We were there for him and for each other.    It couldn’t have been better than that.

Earlier this year my son, Porter, needed a liver transplant.  The cool thing about the liver is that surgeons can take a portion of a healthy liver from a live donor and place it into the recipient.  Dad was devastated when he found out that he was not a viable candidate to donate a portion of his liver to Porter.  He was too old and definitely not healthy enough but he really wanted to give Porter that gift.  So, when the hospital called and asked if we wanted Dad to be a tissue donor we said yes.  It is with great pride that I wear this butterfly pin from the musculoskeletal transplant foundation.  This pin is a symbol of Dad’s gift.  The long bones of his arms and legs will be used to improve lives.  Dad would encourage all of you to consider organ and tissue donation as well.

I believe that Dad is at peace now.  He is whole again.  Healthy and strong.  I sincerely hope that wherever he is now he does not need to miss us because missing loved ones is painful.  I especially hope that he does not miss us because if he misses us than he DEFINITELY misses his ice cream. And that would be tragic!

So, before the summer is over take the time to stop for an ice cream cone.  Enjoy it with someone you love and think of my Dad.  He’d like that.